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Alexandra wrote down that although she looked forward to seeing Nicole, her longtime friend, she was always significantly disappointed when she did. Nicole only talked about her own issues and yet never responded to feedback from a caring friend. Alexandra also wrote that it made her feel undervalued and unappreciated on an emotional level. On a physical level she felt tightness in her chest and tenseness when she was around Nicole.

She realized how much of a toll the strained friendship was taking on her and decided that she wanted to make a change.

She was scared to death but one day when Nicole was on one of her complaint-fests, Alexandra calmly told Nicole that she felt as if her advice was not valued. She asked Nicole if she even wanted advice. She told Nicole that she felt as if Nicole unloaded all of her issues and that she was left with the baggage. She was sure to tell Nicole that she DID care, she just felt so unappreciated. Nicole got defensive.

Alexandra realized that at this point the friendship was based more on her loyalty but that there was still a lot of love too. She also realized that she was not ready to completely abandon Nicole and decided to take a bold move to save their friendship. So, she backed off by limiting their communication to once a day. I know that sounds like a lot, but Nicole had been calling her up to thirty times a day! (And there are ONLY 24 hours in a day!) 

Next week you’ll find out how things are going with these women, three months later.

To Your Fulfillment,

Cara